Anytown's Laws

Anytown's full set of laws can be found here. A summarised version of the most important laws can also be found on this page.

The JIRP Test

Every prospective resident must pass the JIRP test, which rates people on their likelihood to commit crimes and the outlandishness of said crimes. Prospective residents with too low a score will not be guaranteed residence in Anytown.

Tax Laws

Anytown has comparatively lax tax laws. In order to be considered a citizen, a person must reside in the city for at least 91 days in a year. Once this threshold has been reached, the resident can get Anytown's tax laws if they want them.

• Taxpayers have to pay 2% of their annual income as income tax. An exception to this rule is applied to anyone named Mark. They pay 7%.


• A 5% sales tax is applied to every item over $50,000. For items below $50,000 a 3.14% tax is applied.


• A 3% property tax is applied to the current value of every bit of real estate. An exception to this rule is applied to every McDonald's. They pay 0%.

The Ice Cream Act of 1974

Any citizen of Anytown may only eat Cookies-n-Cream flavored ice cream on Sundays. There are no exceptions.

The Ply By Law

Any toilet paper used in Anytown has to be more than 2-ply and less than 3-ply

Matthew's Law

It is strictly forbidden to tie giraffes, adult or child, to the telephone pole at the intersection of Unity Dr. and Ohio Ave. after midnight.
RIP Matthew 1982-1994

Coby's Law

Planting rattraps in a garden not owned by the accused in order to feed the accused's snake is legal provided the accused was attempting to cure Alzheimer's.